Oh! The Holidays! - Some Tips and Ideas for Navigating the Holidays with Your Pup
Oh, the holidays. Some of us love November and December as the cozy part of the year, with lights, celebrations and lots of food while others may find these family- and gathering-focused celebrations a bit tricky to deal with. Our dogs fall into the same two camps, depending on how social they are, how they feel about food, where the festivities are hosted, and more.
Even if you’re one of those people who truly enjoy this time of gathering and feasting, you are probably aware of how tiring even joyful celebrations can be - and they are often even more so for our canine companions. Below, I will be sharing some tips on how to spend a less stressful, safer, and more fun holiday season with your pup.
Yggie and Ripley enjoying some dog safe, unsweetened pumpkin pie mix
Disrupting the Routine - How to Make It Work
Many of our dogs have a distinct routine. Your pup usually eats at about the same time of day, often has the same foods, gets walks and enrichment at specific times, is used to you being out of the house at certain intervals, etc. This is, in fact, great for your dog because it adds a comforting predictability to their routine. However, when the holidays roll around, that routine necessarily has to change. All of a sudden, you might sleep in and be busy cooking. The dog walker may be taking a well deserved day off. You may leave at a different time of day or be home much more than usual. Maybe you have family in town or are planning a gathering at your house. These events may not seem like a big deal to us but often constitute a significant change to your dog’s routine. So how can you help your canid navigate this? Here are three simple tips that can help your dog deal with this change!
1. If you know that the holidays will include a significant shift in your dog's routine, you can become a little bit "predictably unpredictable" in the week before the holiday. If your dog usually eats at a specific time but you know you won't be able to stick to this, feed them a bit earlier or later. You can also shift their walks a bit, walk in a new area, or add some new activities they like. Shake it up a bit, but not all at once. Tread lightly while allowing them to get used to things being different.
2. Put some effort into meeting your dog's needs on the morning of or the day before the holiday. When I know that I'm asking a lot of my dogs because I'll have a dinner party at my house or will be gone a large chunk of time, I usually make a point of taking my dogs out for an off leash romp or a Sniffspot. They will also receive an extra item or two to chew on, and I will feed them their meals in the form of food puzzles. All of this helps them feel that "ahhhh, needs met" effect, which in turn will leave them wanting...less from me. And that's very handy when I have less time to dedicate to them.
3. Make sure your dog is getting quality sleep on those days. You can create a cozy place for your dog to be away from noise and stress, ideally a few days in advance, which you condition positively by hiding treats, serving up meals, and giving food puzzles or chews. Make it extra special by leaving your dog's favorite bed and other beloved items there. If your dog finds noise tricky, you can set up some music or a white noise machine, too. Direct them to the place if you're noticing they're not settling well or are walking around stressed.
Getting your dog used to a change in routine, meeting their needs before a big shift, and assuring they are sleeping well will help your dog feel better about the holiday experience.
Hosting in Your Home
Cricket, Murph, and Yggie brushing up on their “place” skills.
Even if your dog is a social butterfly and enjoys being the life of the party, having large gatherings in the home can be exhausting. I can definitely relate - after a few hours of holiday madness, I'm usually ready for a nap, and when I'm hosting, that nap may have to wait until everyone's gone home.
This is likely pretty similar to what your dog feels like after a few hours of guests in the home. What can make things even harder for your dog, though, is having food around that isn't accessible to them while you most likely will be allowed to enjoy whatever delicacies have been prepared. Couple that with people who might be thoroughly confusing your dog by either feeding them from the table or shooing them away, or both, and these already tiring festivities may add an extra layer of frustration for your pup.
As you can see, there's a lot to unpack here, even if your dog is overall social and doesn't mind people. These following tips can help you navigate the chaos of having people in your home for a festive gathering.
1. Consider which parts of the festivities your dog should join you for. It's not necessary for your pup to be there for every minute of the gathering. Some dogs enjoy a more sedate gathering but may struggle or become way too excited once the kids are high on sugar and running around screaming. Other dogs are great once everyone has come in and settled down but prefer not to be around the chaos of greetings, taking off jackets and exchanging hugs. For many dogs, spending mealtime in a different room with a long lasting food puzzle is a really good idea if they find it difficult to be around food they can't have or you have extra generous friends and family. In short: it's perfectly fine to limit your dog's exposure to guests.
2. Embrace and make use of barriers. There are most likely areas that your dog shouldn't have access to, for example the kitchen, the area where the kids are running around, the Christmas tree, or the dinner table, so it's best to prevent your dog from accessing them in the first place. In addition, creating a space for your dog to withdraw to can be very helpful as well. Exercise pens come in various shapes and sizes and can either be used as a pen or a fence. They're easy to deploy and store once you don't need them anymore. Here is an example of one, but there are many other options out there as well. Another option is using a sturdy baby gate to block off different rooms or contain your dog.
Lumi modeling how an exercise pen set up can save your Yule / Christmas tree. She would have you know that she was a perfect angel around the tree regardless.
3. Brush up on your dog's mat training. Your dog being able to lie on a mat while you sit next to them is great, but how about if a bunch of people are walking by, food is being served, beverages handed around, etc.? It's probably not practical to have a practice gathering to tests your pup’s skills, but you can play distraction games, like I'm doing in this video. You may also want to add the skill of auto settling to your dog's repertoire, which means you give them treats when they choose to settle on the mat on their own. I like to practice these kinds of skills while doing light chores around the house. Having a solid mat settling behavior can help your dog make good choices - but be judicious what you ask of them.
4. Speaking of which: If the distraction level in your home is too high, it's not fair to expect your dog to rest on the mat, so giving them something else to do may be the better choice. I recommend preparing many high value food enrichment options, such as a frozen kong filled with something super yummy for your dog, a box with dog-safe recycling items and treats hidden inside that your dog can rummage through, or a beloved long term chew. Preparing a variety of these options before the gathering starts will ensure that you can simply grab what you need without having to spend too much time and energy on it when you’re in full on host mode.
Hosting, But with a Shy Dog
Ozy getting some much needed r & r in the bedroom away from the guests.
In my last section, I shared a few tips for a social dog at a holiday gathering. But what about your shy or socially awkward dog? Helping these dogs feel at ease when a large party is going on can be much more of a challenge. Being extra cautious with dogs, who, like my own rescue pup Ozymandias, find groups of people difficult to navigate, is not only important for the wellbeing of the dog but also for everyone’s safety. Growls, snaps, nips, or - worse yet - bites tend to happen in high stress and chaotic situations as well as situations where valued resources are abundant (such as the dinner table). So let's dive into some ideas to help our more fragile furry friends feel good about holiday gatherings
1. As already discussed in the last section, I encourage you to consider whether your dog needs to be part of the festivities at all. Of course it's lovely for you when you can have your dog around and show them off, but is it also lovely for your dog? Many dogs are much happier resting in a calm area with a food toy or spending time at someone else's house where there's no party.
2. If you decide that you want your dog out, consider how long they should be out for. At a minimum, spare your dog the most difficult of all challenges: the greeting stage. The front door opening, loud voices calling out hellos, people hugging, jackets being removed - that's a lot for most dogs to deal with. I highly recommend having your dog at least skip this part and then let them into the people-y area once everyone has settled down.
3. I usually base my decision on how much I want my dog around at least partly on the level of skills that my guests have. Many shy dogs do much better when guests initially ignore them, meaning no eye contact, reaching, touching or talking. That sounds simple, but is Aunt Jane going to be able to follow these rules? How about 5 year old Nephew Joe? If your gathering is made up of folks that you know will hear you, prime them in advance and get consent that they are all willing and able to follow these rules. If there is any doubt in your mind whether your guests can stick to the rules, I recommend not giving them access to your dog - especially when you can't supervise closely.
4. If your dog is part of the celebration, you want to have a clear idea of when it's time to remove them from the situation if needed. Ahead of time, begin studying up on your dog's body language and become aware of the subtle signs of stress that precede a bigger response. Since you live with your dog, you have the unique opportunity to observe them moving about their day and gauging what your dog looks like when stressed or relaxed. Ask yourself: what are the ears, eyes, mouth, and tail doing? How is your dog's breathing? Where and how are they shifting their weight? Are the muscles tense or relaxed? This video provides a good overview of more general body language cues, and it's always best to study your dog as the unique individual they are. Once you understand the ways in which your dog communicates stress, you are much better able to make informed decisions about what to do.
5. Next, create and condition a calm place away from the hubbub - such as a bedroom, exercise pen set up or crate that you equip with cozy bedding, some sound-dampening music (Ozy loves John Denver) and a favorite food enrichment activity. Make this a fun place in the days prior to the holiday gathering by putting treats, meals, favorite toys, and other wonderful things there. Next, teach your dog to withdraw to the calm place on cue. In the days before the big event, teach your dog a "treat party". That means, get your dog's attention in exactly as fun a way as your dog enjoys - I gently clap my hands and sing "Ozy Ozy Ozy treat party" - and then walk them over to a treat jar. Once they understand that it's worth following the party, start treat partying them over to the calm place and feed your pup high value food when you get there. Do this quite a few times before the gathering so that you can party your dog right over to their calm space when you notice those subtle signs of stress.
6. As a final step, consider whether short term anxiety medication might be part of your strategy to support your dog's mental health. Talk to your vet or a veterinary behaviorist to see if they would recommend pursuing this step to help your dog remain cool, calm, and collected a challenging situation.
I hope this newsletter gives you some ideas on how to navigate the holidays with your beloved fur child. If you are at all worried about finding ways to help your dog enjoy holiday gatherings, I highly recommend reaching out to a professional to get a game plan together. I’m here to help, for example with my Behavior Chat service, which is excellent for troubleshooting these kinds of situations.
Ozy wishes you happy holidays and hopes you take your pup for a snowy hike out on the trail, especially if your name is Verena
